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Wednesday 7 December 2011

divorce a taboo

I am divorced and i dont like to use my husbands surname and neither does my daughter but sadly enough everytime she had to fill a form for college application or something there was always an option of fathers name but or local guardian but not of mother name it disturbed me and frustrated me to go to her college explain the situation and have my name written in front of fathers name.
In the metropolitan cities of india a small percentage of people are divorced and are quite open about it but for smaller states and cities like jammu,kanpur etc divorce is a big deal.12years since my divorce yet except for my immediate family in jammu(my hometown)nobody is told that i got divorced as per the distant relatives and friends even uncles and aunts for that matter i am still living happily with my husband in delhi.Though deep in their hearts they do know that i am divorced yet everytime i or my daughter get to see them the same question how is x in a sarcastic manner(thats my ex husband for you).
I cant help but wonder do you really expect everyone to find their soulmate in one go?i mean of course their are many fortunate people who do but not everyone can. When you are young  you make mistakes,you fall in love, get married and after a while realise its not working,he/she is not the one for you,so for the sake of society do you continue suffering in an emotionally or physicaly abusive relationship that is not working or do you set yourself free and live in peace?Why in our country is divorce still a taboo?

5 comments:

  1. rightly said Alka,

    better to be apart instead of livivng together parted.

    Indians should grow up in their thought and thinking.

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  2. Hi, my first time here and I enjoy reading your post, i agree, why live with him/her if you feel burden or unhappy? Life is too short, why wait till no time anymore if you can do things to find other one that can be your true mate? There are some people who love to talk and keep talking others life, but deep inside they are envy with those who find their real happiness to others arms. don't mind them! Go for your happiness!:)

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  3. sorry some typo error.. to others arm..:)

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  4. You know most relatives are not told because the moment they hear that someone got divorced, they have no qualms telling the world that the woman is to blame, that she doesn't know to be a good wife.

    Our society itself is screwed up that way-_-

    ReplyDelete
  5. @readitt and peevee exactly people need to grow up and stop poking there noses in others lives its funny the neighbours when they see a single lady living next door start asking you stay alone?and husband?uuuggghhhh....hi saggi i completely agree with you life is too short to screw up for strangers:)

    ReplyDelete

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